Without further ado, the list of reasons why your house ad sucks, created solely by my unenlightened inexperienced homebuyer self. Oh wait... it's "a great starter home for first time homebuyers"? Maybe you should listen to me.
- Your photo sucks
Practically every home ad includes at least (sometimes only) one photo. Why on Earth would you use that photo to take a picture of the complex welcome sign? Could you not just use words for that? Is that picture of four words really worth a thousand words? If there's only one photo I get to see, it had better be a shot of the front of the house! Or, if there's something truly impressive (ie. newly remodelled kitchen, or stunning view), then maybe that, but it had better be gosh darn impressive.
Collary: the rest of your photos suck too!
If you're using a website, you can generally include lots more photos. THEN DO IT! Why only include two or three? Digital cameras are cheap, webspace even more so. Anyone who can afford your house has broadband, so don't worry about my poor overworked Internet connection. And lrn2photos, people! I admit openly interior house shots are difficult to photograph well, but at least try to get a few with decent lighting. And it really isn't that hard to maintain the aspect ratio when you upload them. Oh, and take at least one picture of every room - if you leave one out, I'll assume you did so for a reason.
- Location, Location, Location!
Sorry, I don't care how nice your house is, if it's in Tacoma, and I work in Seattle, I'm not buying it. Plus, this tempers everything else you say about the house - price can vary heavily by region. And no, the county is not enough! I *must* know the neighbourhood of the city in which it is located. Ideally, I want the exact address, but I acknowledge that this may not be appropriate for some venues. Thankfully MLS listings always seem to require exact addresses.
- Size matters.
It may be newly remodelled and be in the best school district, but I'm not spending my life savings just to close a deal on something smaller than my bachelor apartment. This applies to all the main statistics: square footage (both the house, and if applicable, the lot), bedrooms, bathrooms, floors. If you don't tell me, I assume it's because the numbers are bad for the price you're charging.
- HOA / Community Issues
While not always applicable, or simply not enough room, if you can, I need to know about the community. HOA dues are good to know, but what do they cover? What about the inevitable pain the nearly pervasive HOAs around here inflict? Pet policies? Restrictions on modifying unit exteriors?
- It's Nice?
Come on now, you have a text box to sell your house with. You should really fill it with key selling points, and avoid duplication or fluff. This is the 21st century; I don't need you to tell me that it's minutes from the highway - I'm looking at the satellite imagery of you on your front porch as we speak! If the stats are elsewhere, don't repeat them. I want to know about the sweet upgrades, your buyer bonus, how you get complimentary room service for life, and how it's peaceful and quiet. Oh, and it's "luxurious, modern living at an affordable price?" Strange, so were the last three!
Now people are wondering two things, I'd bet.
First, do people really do nooby things like this?
Go visit Craigslist, and take a look. Next question.
Sorry, no. Maybe in a hot market you can get away with that, but when I'm seeing a dozen listings a day for potential purchases, let me tell you that I'm not wasting my time on your crappy ad. Anything I don't see I assume the worst about, and that'll quickly get you cut from my shortlist.
That's my rant. Carry on.